Sunday, April 27, 2008

Crappy Saturday

Coming from the gym, I was on my way to meet my friends for our usual gimik night when I received a text message from a person whom I dated once.

'I may have hurt you. But now, you are the one hurting me. Even ten times stronger' or something to that effect. I was too pissed last night that I emptied my inbox.

I replied, "Ha? Dahil lang sa umiwas ako dahil hindi pa ako handa magkaroon ng kasunod. Ganyan na ibabalik mo sa'kin? Stop with the guilt trip. My life's fucked up as it is."

"D un guilt trip." sagot niya.

"So anu un? Umiwas ako dahil alam mong magulo ang buhay ko. Dahil ayoko pa masundan. Wag mong ipagdudukdukan na sinaktan kita. Kung ganyan lang din ang itetext mo sa'ken, might as well save your load. Magulo ang buhay ko." I texted.

"I was only playing the role of a friend. And yet to treat me as someone to defy. Cguro tama ka, I'll save up my load if in case handa ka ng magpatulong saken and I will wait for your reply. Gudnyt" (again, not exact verbatim)

For a person who was never there when I needed someone to cry on, how dare you?

Anung sinabi mo nung nabasa mo ung blog ko?

'I read ur blog. Sorry dahil nakikigulo pa ako....' I forgot the rest. Sabi ko okay lang. Hindi mo kasalanan.

AND THEN WHAT?!

Nada.

You never bothered to ask me kung ok lang ako after that text.

It was as if I never existed.

Yan ba ang nagpplay ng role as a 'friend'?

Sorry, but the last time I checked, 'friends', like the one you claim to be, don't leave each other.

ESPECIALLY during times like that!

Spare me the 'I-hurt-you-ten-times-stronger' crap.

Nagpaparamdam ka lang kapag nakikita mo ung pangalan ko sa Multiply mo.

Nagpaparamdam ka lang kapag nakikita mo ung name ko sa phone mo.

Is that how you are as a 'friend'?

And again, everything you do is your the consequence of your choices. So If I may have hurt you, ikaw mismo nagdecide noon na i-risk yon.

Just like how I risked everything for you when we started going out last year until you told me you can not give me what I deserve.

We both agreed on that. Na hindi mo ako mabibigyan ng oras dahil madami kang ibang priorities. Or did you just forget?

Hindi ko tuloy masyadong na-enjoy ung gimik ko dahil dun.

Thank you soo much for doing that!

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